Dear Editor, I'm bored in English class so I though I'd write a letter to the editor. Jessie Dear Ed, I demand a recount! Who counted the multitudinous Mission Statement ballots for the OUMMCBNOM anyway? We need Pud and Cam back to get this newsletter heading back in the right direction. I'll get those ballots were counted by illiterate rodents. Where is Fifi when we need her? Please end the strike. I'd be willing to double my subscription fee if you would get Pud and Cam to come back. Maybe, as a highly paid editor, you could write Pud and Cam on occasion (just a suggestion). Rancid in Racine A Letter From The Editor I hope you have enjoyed this special fiction issue of the OUMMCBNOM. If you have some great literary work which you would like to see featured in an upcoming OUMMCBNOM, please feel free to give it to your nearest OUMMCBNOM staff member. Remember, the more pages it takes up, the better. At this time, I will not even comment on the letter-writing issue. If your conscience has not made you write yet, I suppose it never will. Don't forget to enter the YUB Lyric Writing Contest. No deadline for entries has yet been set, but next month we will have a brand new contest for you, so it would be wise to enter the YUB contest within the next few weeks (this will give you time to work on the new contest). Well, that concludes my comments for today. I look forward to seeing you next month!
THE OUMMCBNOM MISSION"Our mission is to increase the Jell-o-like substance in our readers heads andyet help them remain living, breathing, non-functioning organisms. In addition, we would like to suck the Jell-o-like substance out with a handheld vacuum and eat it at teatime with Prudence & Camilla, in effect leaving the subscribers as non-thinking . . ."
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